Three Steps to Boost Your Body Confidence
A few weeks ago, I received a text from one of my photographer friends that basically said, "I am doing a boudoir shoot tomorrow night and one of my models just dropped out, are you interested in modeling for me?"
I've been feeling pretty fugly since stepping on the scale and realizing I had gained twenty pounds. I didn't feel sexy at all. Plus, I had never done boudoir before. I've done some simple modeling here and there, (see: Pizza Hut Instagram hand modeling) but I had no clue how to do boudoir. How do you pose in a sexy way when you feel the total opposite? There was no way I was doing this photoshoot.
So, I dug my confidence out of the shitter and texted her back, "sure." WTF. I was going to do a nudie photoshoot with four mega-hotties that I had never met before.
My friend told me to bring "anything that makes me feel sexy," which was tricky since I felt like a level 10 troll in everything I owned and had been living in sweatpants for the last couple of weeks (See: Regina George). I picked out my favorite underwear, a really soft scarf that my boyfriend's grandmother bought me (serious), and a leather jacket and headed to her house. When I got there, the girls were so pretty and seemed to know exactly what they were doing. I wanted to hide under the table. I must have looked really clueless, because one of them came over and introduced herself and started rifling through my things to help me pick out an outfit. Thank GOD. If I looked bad, I could blame her. She picked out a loose white tank top with thigh high stockings and a cool choker necklace. I tried it on, poured a glass of wine, and slowly started to feel like a badass.
Once it was my turn to model, I was a little nervous, but eventually started to loosen up and have fun. I ended up wearing three different outfits and figured out the right poses to feel hot AF in all of them.
Here are a few of the finished photos...
So, here's where we talk about the title of this post. How did I fake my way into body confidence? I'll never know for sure if it was magic or an actual solid effort on my part, but for the sake of the lesson, let's go through some tips to fake it until you make it.
1. Create something. Plan a sexy photoshoot, a night out with friends, or make a youtube video.
The first step is to just create something. It can be a material thing like a photo or video, or you can let your body be the creation.
2. Change your appearance.
Okay, I know this seems like the opposite of what this is supposed to be about, but hear me out. View your body as an art canvas. This is an opportunity to create something awesome on your canvas. Wear something you wouldn't normally wear. Do wild make-up. Wear a wig. Anything. Just do something different. You don't even have to feel sexy in it. Just do something different with your look. For me, changing my look helps me disconnect my ego from my appearance. It helps me remember that I am more than how I look, and once I am disconnected from my appearance, I can mold my perception into anything.
3. Pretend everyone is looking at you.
For a lot of us, our first instinct when someone is looking at us is to turn away in embarrassment. Instead, pretend that you are the hottest person in the room and everyone is noticing you. Just thinking in the back of your mind that people are noticing you for something positive is often enough to trick us into holding ourselves with more confidence.